Enough

I am really frustrated right now. I think most parents of special needs kids probably reach a breaking point every once and a while. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids but I am at the end of my rope. I just wish my kids could experience things like all the other "typical" kids. Now I know that there are those out there that say all kids have rough spots and throw fit etc. There is one major difference though. Life is ALWAYS like that for my family.

My husband and I took Jessica and Jack to the town pond today. Today was the big swim meet, that they do every year. We have been talking about it to them for a few days, so they would know what to expect. There would be different races, and they would get medals.
Sounds fun and easy, right?

WRONG.

Jessica started out great by doing some warm up exercises with all the kids (about 30). Jessica doing jumping jacks is quite a sight to see, and I actually had some high hopes for the day. Jack did not warm up to the idea of racing, and I was fine with it. Until he started throwing a fit because he was mad at himself for not racing.
Then Jessica started screaming. Just full on screaming for no reason. All the parents looked at me like I was some horrible mother that could not control her kids. My husband was somewhat useless because he was running on 2 hours of sleep, and couldn't understand what was about to happen.

Jessica screamed as she ran across the beach and into the water. Jack then started to melt down again. I was trying to bribe him as Mike tried to get Jessica to sit down with us.

Jessica eventually settled down, but decided she wanted to to the 5/6 year old girls balloon race. This is a race where you have to get your balloon across the finish line in the water without touching it. Basically using your belly and feet. Of course Jessica carried the balloon the whole way. And then it popped. I just knew that this was the end of the line for her....and I was right.

There are so many other things that happened in this short 60 minute time span that I could write about. But I have had enough, and don't want to relive the looks from the other parents and the look on Jessica and Jack's face. I don't want to remember that Jack got himself so upset that he couldn't breathe.

Tomorrow is another day, and we will start over again. But for today, I have had enough.